


I Write Sins Not Tragedies

by orphan_account



Series: I Write Sins Not Tragedies [2]
Category: Bandom, My Chemical Romance, Panic! at the Disco
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-05
Updated: 2014-10-05
Packaged: 2018-02-19 22:22:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2405030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The story of how Brendon Urie got his art teacher fired.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Write Sins Not Tragedies

Ryan sort of hated how nosy his boyfriend was.

Like, don’t get him wrong, Brendon was pretty great. Most of the time. Except when he decided he needed to know _everything_ about _everyone_. You would think he had learned his lesson after last time, when he accidentally outed some jock in front of all his friends - but no. He still butted into everyone’s business.

Which is why this is the story of how Brendon Urie got his art teacher fired.

It all started when Brendon noticed a picture of Mr. Way on his desk. The art teacher had his arm around some girl, and was smiling at her and another dude. Being the nosy fuck he was, Brendon dragged Ryan over to Mr. Way after class, asking about it.

“Hey, Mr. Way!” he said cheerfully. “Nice picture. Who are they?”

Mr. Way smiled warily. “My brother Mikey, and the girl’s Alicia.”

Brendon opened his mouth to say something else, but before he could continue, Mr. Way cut him off. “Ryan, do you guys have lunch now?”

“Nope,” Ryan replied. “We’re supposed to be in reading with Mr. Iero now.”

Mr. Way kind of blushed, which made no sense, but he also looked relieved. “Okay, then, guys, go to class. We clearly can’t talk now, bye.”

(Ryan thinks Mr. Way is being slightly rude, but he can’t really blame him. This is literally everyone’s reaction to Brendon.)

“But -” Brendon protests, and Mr. Way cuts him off quickly.

“Go to class, guys, I’ll see you two tomorrow. I really do need to get some work done before my next period.” He points at the door hopefully. Brendon looks resigned for a moment, before lighting up.

“Hey, Mr. Way, is that a wedding ring? You’re married?”

He sighs. “Yes, Brendon, I’m married, but seriously. As much as I love being interrogated, I’m actually busy, and you have class.”

“I don’t mind missing class.”

Ryan rolls his eyes. “I mind. Come on, asshole - oops, sorry, Mr. Way.”

Mr. Way laughs, “It’s okay. Just take him and get out.”

Walking towards their next class in the by now empty hallway, Brendon grinned at Ryan. “His wife is pretty.”

“Brendon, you don’t know that ‘Alicia’ is his wife. Dude, you have female friends, that doesn’t mean you’re married to them.”

Brendon looks confused. “Well, duh, Ryan. I’m dating you! And I’m really gay. I don’t think me marrying a girl is really an option here.”

Ryan facepalmed.

Brendon continues, “Plus, I saw him texting in class one day, when we were doing independent work, and he was texting Alicia WAY.”

“Oh, well then I guess he is married to - wait, why were you reading his texts?”

Brendon at least has the decency to look a bit embarrassed. “I was bored.”

Ryan facepalms again.

**********

The second step to Brendon accidentally ruining Mr. Way’s career was actually kind of Ryan’s fault.

Brendon still was the major problem - but, well, it probably could have been avoided if Ryan hadn’t forgotten his reading homework and needed to drop it off after school. Ryan had dragged Brendon along with him, even though he complained the whole time.

“This is so stupid,” he whined. “Why do we have to go back after school, Ryan? Give it to him tomorrow, seriously.”

Ryan sighed. “Brendon, if I give it to him tomorrow, I’m only getting half credit.”

“So get half credit?” Brendon said hopefully.

Ryan glared at him. “No. And seriously, its not like you had anything better to do, so shut up.”  
Annoyed, Ryan sped up a little, walking ahead of Brendon. Which meant he got to Mr. Iero's classroom before Brendon.

Which meant he saw Mr. Way (it was definitely him, no one else had bright red hair like that) push Mr. Iero up against the chalkboard and kiss him passionately before Brendon.

Ryan's mouth fell open.

"Gerard," Mr. Iero moaned, tangling his hands in the other's hair. They continued to kiss, until Brendon came up behind Ryan and saw what was happening.

"OH MY GOD," He exclaimed loudly.

The teachers broke apart immediately, blushing furiously. Mr. Iero wiped at his mouth, spluttering. "Ryan! I didn't realize you were coming."

Mr. Way's eyes were wide. He looked really freaked out, eyes darting between Ryan, Brendon, and Mr. Iero. He finally settled on Brendon. “Brendon,” he said pleadingly. “Don’t tell everyone, come on.”

Brendon smirked, and Ryan kicked him in the shin before he could say something stupid. Even if Brendon liked gossip, these were still their teachers. “He won’t tell anyone, Mr. Way.”

Mr. Way looked relieved for a second, before muttering some excuse and running off to his classroom. Mr. Iero watched him leave, before quickly asking for Ryan’s homework, avoiding eye contact while he took it.

“Um, yeah, we’re just gonna leave now…” Ryan said. He felt really uncomfortable. This was almost as awkward as if the teachers had caught Brendon and Ryan kissing. Except worse, because, well, they were the teachers, and Mr. Way was married. To a _woman_ , who was _not_ Mr. Iero.

**********

It was all Brendon’s fault in the end, though.

Everything was fine until about a week after the… incident. A bit awkward, because neither man would look at Ryan or Brendon anymore, but fine.

“Guys,” Mr. Way said, “Principal Schechter and some guy from the school board is going to look in on our class today, to evaluate my teaching. You don’t really need to do much, ‘cause I’ll be showing a powerpoint today, but just behave, please.”

Ryan nodded along with everyone else. Brendon turned an unfortunate shade of white. “Shit,” he hissed.

Ryan raised an eyebrow. “Shit,” Brendon swore again. “Shit, Ryan, I didn’t know the school board was coming in, I only wanted to embarrass him in front of the class, I mean he deserved that but he doesn’t deserve to have his whole career ruined, and I think I was a little drunk when I did it, but, shit, Ryan, I’m dead, Mr. Way’s dead, we’re all dead!”  
Ryan had never seen Brendon look so worried before, and Ryan had seen Brendon do a lot of stupid things. “What did you do, Brendon?”

“I kind of edited his powerpoint so that it reveals that he kissed Mr. Iero, but I made it seem like he wrote it, and I really didn’t know the school board was coming in, shit, I was just upset because I felt bad for his wife, and I thought he needed to get a reality check that he can’t just cheat without consequences, but I didn’t mean for it to be this bad, Ryan, really.”

Ryan stares. “Brendon. Oh my god.”

“I know!” Brendon says, sounding hysterical. The principal and some old woman from the school board came in and sat in the back of the room. Brendon looked like he might cry.

Mr. Way smiled at the two new people in the room, and pulled up his presentation. “Famous Artists and Their Techniques,” read the title page.

“Fuck, fuck fuck,” Brendon muttered under his breath.

Mr. Way clicked to the next slide. Then he did an obvious double take. The page read, “The first artist who YES I WOULD JUST LIKE TO SAY I CHEAT ON MY WIFE AND I’M FUCKING A MAN AND THANK YOU AND GOOD DAY.”

The other students in the class looked confused, looking around at each other. Mr. Way looked absolutely horrified, as did Brendon and Ryan. The old woman, though, she looked furious. “This is scandalous!” she cried. “Mr. Way! I cannot believe you would think its funny to write this! And try to teach the students that its okay to be gay! You’re fired!”

Mr. Way protested weakly, “But I didn’t write that!”

She glared at him. “Who else could have? You are coming with me,” and she dragged the teacher from the classroom like a child.

Ryan turned around. “Oh my god, Brendon, you are the biggest asshole ever.”

Brendon nodded sadly. “I know.”

**********

The next day, Ryan and Brendon were walking by the art room and they saw Mr. Way packing up all his things into a bag. Ryan glared at Brendon, looking meaningful into the room. Brendon, looking nervous, walked inside, Ryan behind him.

“Um, Mr. Way?” Brendon asked tentatively.

Mr. Way looked up, sighing when he saw Brendon. “What, Brendon?”

Brendon looks down at the floor. “I’m really sorry, Mr. Way. Really.”

Mr. Way sighs again. “Why would you even do that, Brendon?”

“Um, because I felt bad for your wife? I’m sorry?”

Mr. Way looks very confused. “My wife? I don’t have a wife?”

Now Brendon looks confused. “Alicia?”

Mr. Way’s eyes widen almost comically, “Alicia’s not my wife! She’s my sister in-law! I’m married to Frank - um, Mr. Iero.”

“But you have different last names.”

“Yeah, well, there couldn’t really be two Mr. Ways or Mr. Ieros in one school, now, could there?” Mr. Way smiles ironically. “Not that it matters now, though.”

Brendon bites his lip. “I’m really, really sorry. I’ll tell the board everything if you want, tell them that it was me and they shouldn’t fire you. I’m really sorry.”

Mr. Way shakes his head. “No, Brendon, that’s okay, I’ve actually been working on some writing and art of my own and this will give me more time to pursue it. Besides, that lady’s had it out for me since I dyed my hair, anyway.”

Brendon nods. “Okay, Mr. Way.”

“We’ll miss you,” Ryan adds.

Mr. Way finally stops looking mildly annoyed at Brendon and smirks. “Who says you won’t see me around? Maybe Ryan’ll forget his homework again.” He laughs.

(Half a year later, this is also the story of how Gerard Way became a famous comic book writer, how Brendon Urie stopped messing with people’s lives, how Ryan Ross started doing his homework on time, and how Frank Iero learned to _close the goddamned door_ when he was kissing his husband.)

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> (This story was actually called Headfirst Slide Into Cooperstown On A Bad Bet until literally a minute ago, when I realized, wow, I Write Sins Not Tragedies totally describes this.)


End file.
